Who am I?

Tired of the beats that I used to hate but have grown to enjoy
Under the influence of alcohol
Taking control of your mind
To lose yourself

It's fun they say
It's fun I say
I enjoy the fun

It's part of life I say
Saying that I don't enjoy it would be a lie

I do enjoy it.

But then I contradict myself when I am alone
and when I reflect.
I dislike me when I'm in it.

I love my family.
I treasure my friends.
I value myself.

Who am I?

They say that this is uni/college.

.. but is this me?

I think..

I think it's important to be

humble
pure
conservative
light hearted
open
wise
modest
fun

I think it is important to learn from whatever
life and God is doing/taking (to) you.

We're all little children, fertilized by our own lives.

Du nut giv up!

When you give yourself time to think
It's either you feel happy or sad.

But right now I feel sad and odd.
Like I'm still searching for someone that has already be found.

And also, it sucks comparing yourself.
Why can't I realize that
I am my own individual
This is my life
I live it by the decisions I make
and the mistakes I've done
Because life lessons are what builds you up
To be whoever or whatever you want to be.
And the decision to things you make are medication for your soul.

I wish you could see

The feelings inside of me

I wish I could show you how I feel

But I fear vulnerability

Of showing emotions

Only to receive rejection

But how would I know

If I show feelings of a living stone

I could feel something

But this cycle

Makes me scared